A Rock Feels No Pain

In despero , obscurum ; In Diligo , Lux lucis. (In despair, darkness; In Love, Light). -Me


Original post date was August 14, 2006

I wish I’d feel more energetic, sometimes. I think of things I should be doing, and can’t seem to get the energy to do them; worse, sometimes I think of things, don’t have the energy to do them, and also don’t have the energy to care that I’m not doing them.

Simple, stupid things, like loading my dishes into the machine, or putting the latest stack of “just read” books onto shelves, takes a huge effort, and major planning.

Other times, I can’t stop doing things; I’ve vacuumed the entire house at 300 in the morning, simply because I couldn’t sleep and felt like it.

Irritating. I’m hoping that when the family gets home, I’ll get a little balance back, in the timing that I’m up and active versus sleepy and lazy.

I did manage to get to the quack today, he’s sending me to another psycho dude; we’ll see what happens there, I’m very indifferent to it all at the moment; another thing I can’t seem to care about right now, but he insists that it’s not ok to not feel better, and that we’ll try what we need to. I said “fine”, which is better than my thinking a few weeks ago, so I guess that’s progress.


Filed under: depression

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